i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
