Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize