Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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