Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
