I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
being pregnant is like rehab
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
