No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
