when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
