His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
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