I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
