We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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