Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I just found a bag of teeth...
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Shame - the story of my life.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
