idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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