I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
