They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize