are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
