You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
