think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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