i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
