See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
