You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
But theres a keg here and me gusta
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
