we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
