so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
His hands were made for my vagina.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
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