Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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