I don't think brook has ever known best
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
