isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize