glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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