i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
