trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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