Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
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