Fuck appropriateness.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
