i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
you told grandpa to call you daddy
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
