lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize