This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
