I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Bring me that man meat
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize