So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
