oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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