he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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