whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
