Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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