oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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