That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Randomize
