Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Just invented taco cereal.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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