when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
