I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
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