Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
