I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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