carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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