I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
