well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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