I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
