is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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