I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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